Notes from the bunker

233 weeks of winning.

Greetings loyal serfs from my deepest of August bunkers. Almost half way through the worst month of the year. So far, just the usual disasters. But they only affect poor people so it doesn’t count.

It was nice to out for a while beyond the range of Ukraine’s missiles and visit our Pacific islands which are 8 time zones further east from Moscow. At least the islands are currently out of their range. It will never cease to amaze Prez that “anti-colonialists” never seem to notice that a white man rules one third of Asia from a city in Europe. Perhaps they think everyone who lived there was really happy that we turned up and told them that they are now ruled by us. May all of your enemies turn out to be as stupid as my allies are. Or maybe that’s the case already. Whatever.

Anyway. I went to visit a school on the island. Being stuck in a bunker with Medvedev has left me used to talking to people with the mental age of a nine year old. These ones didn’t stink of vodka and urine though. But I’ve always liked kids. So to speak.

Then I visited a hospital on the island, which is where the kids will end up in ten years time courtesy of whichever peace war we have then. Although, in this one there weren’t any men missing limbs thanks to their time in Ukraine, so that proves that claims we are taking huge casualties are false.

There weren’t any fuel shortages on the island either. At least I didn’t see any queues for fuel, so that must mean the Ukrainian psyop of bombing the economy to destruction is just fake. Mind you, I haven’t stood in a queue for anything since the USSR existed so what I know? It’s not like my security would let a long line of cars wait by the road while I drove past it in my western brand limo.

I had a good mingle with some genuine locals who were not that troupe of actors who follow me around playing the parts of dutiful peasants awestruck by the presence of their Czar. It was definitely spontaneous, none of them were subjected to a full cavity search beforehand, and as far as I know their families were released unharmed once I headed home.

Elsewhere it was reported that Ukraine had re captured 745 square kilometres of land. This is an insignificant result that means absolutely nothing. Although when we were capturing similar amounts (for next to zero casualties) my trolls were stroking themselves to victorious climaxes and predicting Ukraine’s imminent collapse. All of this just shows that Ukraine’s program of destroying our logistics is making no difference whatsoever. You can hardly call it a military success if you just take land where the defenders have either starved to death or used their last bullet to shoot themselves with. If you don’t take several hundred casualties to capture of field of mud, can you really call it a military success? Checkmate, imperialists.

Speaking of reports, there is continued speculation and discussion that we have a manpower crisis and need a mobilization to continue the war. Medvedev has denied this and honestly, if you can’t believe Dima, who can you believe? Anyway, there are quite a few people out there explaining what a complete disaster the mobilization, that is not going to happen, will be for Russia. It’s almost as if they think we will have one. Russia has a massive surplus of men and our 5^th summer offensive will be one that works. Recruiting offices are full of men desperate to be part of all the winning. Or to sign a contract for more money than they’ll ever see in a lifetime before they get forced into the army and paid in turnips.

Finally, I sent Donald a whatsapp thanking him for all he is doing to help me kill Ukrainian civilians. If not for him and his brilliant war against Iran, there might be a few spare Patriots around. As it is, we can continue to kill kids without anyone stopping us. He probably wouldn’t give them to Ukraine anyway. He let us attack Ukraine every day he was POTUS the first time and he has let us attack Ukraine every time he has been POTUS the second time. Anyone who thinks he wants Ukraine to win is more drunk than Dima.

And in a related topic, hand in hand with Donald helping us out, Amnesty haven’t used their largest account to mention Ukraine since June 1. They haven’t mentioned one of our attacks on civilians since May 18. Almost 90 days. Must send them a note thanking them for their part in normalizing the savagery.

Have a nice weekend. I remain a master strategist.